I am not completely unscathed
Try as I may to protect my heart
The pounding insults start to leave their mark
Is this a test to see how well I am doing?
Bring back to back assaults from the original abusers to see how I would fare?
And what exactly is it
That doesn’t allow me to just cut the ties
To just walk away
And not turn back
What is their hold on me that doesn’t let me not turn into it again?
I don’t have the answers in this moment
But I do know
That I didn’t cower in a corner
For either one of them!
I lost my cool with the first
But that made me better able to deal with the second
A tag team of abuse
It is not fun
There’s a distant smell of fear
No. I’m not completely unscathed
But I’m not a victim either!
Blessitude!
Lorrie <3
11/20/16
POSTS IN THE SERIES
(Links will become active after each writing is posted)
1). Consequences ~ The Fishing Expedition
2). Consequences ~ The Fallout
3). Consequences ~ The Bottom Line
4). Consequences ~ The Continuum of Light
5). Consequences ~ I Am Not Completely Unscathed
7). Consequences ~ THANKSGIVING
Oh, Lorrie, non of us remain untouched or unscathed. Beautiful paintings are a balm. Thank you.
Thanks, Michael 🙂 I used to think my scars were shameful and had to be hidden. Now I embrace them because they have taught me so much…and I am who I am partly because of them. Enjoy this beautiful Sunday ♡
Stay strong my friend.
Thank you, Lorrie! You bet!! I am standing in my power. I made a huge decision to not put myself in harms way for the holiday…and it feels good 🙂 Blessings, friend ♡
Awesome. Enjoy your holiday!
You, too, Lorrie!! ♡
Love this and the art work. Beautiful.
Hi Marlene! Thank you so much 🙂 I am adding a project to my very long list….and that is to actually paint (or I should say TRY to paint) one of these images that accompany this series. Maybe I will put out a vote on my blog to see which one I should try…but then I would have to post it!!
Have a beautiful day, Marlene ♡
If this is your life… leave there and never look back..
Oh…it’s my life…and I have gone back “in” more times than I care to admit. This time feels different. I pray!
Blessings to you my friend ♡
You are strong and you need to see it in yourself…. You need to break the cycle and have compassion on your suffering most of all.
Thank you so much for your heartfelt words! I feel very strong in my soul that recent decisions I made are the correct ones. And I really do realize that I am the only one who can change…and break the cycle. Blessings to you for a wonderful Thanksgiving! ♡
Then it’s time to stop… I know it isn’t easy but you deserve better… Peace
Amen!! Thank you, friend. That is definitely an underlying issue…I’m sure…it’s time I know I deserve better. Love!
Hi Lorrie, you have unearthed long standing hurts which buried themselves deep within you. You are standing strong dear friend and you now you maintain your sovereignty and autonomy over these people. Gaining strength and confidence to turn the links and connections into nothing. Closing the doors firmly and sealing them so they can no longer reoccur. You are wounded from this battle but will rise in strength and love from God. Your wounds are ones of victory well earned and are healing. Sending Soul Love to you and prayers for your healing.
Thank you. Thank you…I feel such a blessing from your words and I know they are truth. It is a different energy that I am feeling. In the past I would stand strong for a little while but I always succumbed to a place of inferiority. I feel stronger…and more capable to be my own person. I always had such fear of these people (with good reason) but I am thinking differently. And I am so grateful!!
Thank you for your beautiful support! ♡
I see progress Lorrie. For me, very few deep hurts and patterns go away, they scar, diminish, teach, and go in a spiral of lessons and healing. Only you know the best course for you. Listen to your heart and choose. I know you will rise and keep loving. Hugs and blessings.
Thank you, Brad! That is awesome advice and exactly how I have been trying to live my life from the most authentic place….listening to my heart….to the voice that I hear in my chest not my head. It just feels right and…so it is!! Lots of love and light, Brad! And Happy Thanksgiving! ♡
You’re doing great Lorrie. I appreciate you and the Thanksgiving wishes. <3
Hi Lorrie,
I’m enjoying what you are doing here with these images, these paintings, (and they are changing); and your expressions, they relate on an archetypal level very deeply. I can move along with them.
Much love to you, Ka
Thank you so much, Ka!! It felt right to use the same image and manipulate it…just as my journey has changed. Thanks for seeing it…feeling it…and being here! Blessings ♡
My pleasure, and did I wish you an early Happy Thanksgiving back?! Absolutely. I am thankful that you are here and aboard your mighty vessel, and forging your way through the fire.
♡♡
very beautiful Lorrie – as they say ” “We are free to choose our paths, but we can’t choose the consequences that come with them.”
Ah! Yes, Mino! I am choosing new paths and with the hopes that the consequences will be finer!! Thanks so much for leaving your energy here ♡
Send you healing thoughts, Lorrie 🙂
Thank you, Irene…I can feel your beautiful energy! I am healing…and feeling so much stronger 🙂 Blessings to you ♡
Great to hear, that you are healing, Lorrie. Blessings for you too 🙂
♡♡♡ Wishing you lots of creative energy, Irene! Happy Monday 🙂
Yes, definitely a great big step to not see one as victim. We are here to learn, after all. Blaming others is one way to go, for sure, but really just ensures we’ll get the same lesson/s, over and over (and over) again (and again). Blessings, dear Lorrie! <3
Ah! Right to the center like an arrow to the bullseye, Bela! And the “over and over” and “again and again” all bombarded me this time in a matter of a week!! The lesson was hard and complete and it feels like it has been reinforced 😉
Sometimes habits that have been in place for a lifetime (or more..?) are particularly persistent. I feel stronger and I feel in control of my thoughts and, at least for the moment, my life!
Blessings to you…and thank you for your thoughts. ♡
What I used to say to clients – because I really did know it to my bones to be true – is that we come into this life with karmic ‘themes’ which repeat over and over again, just changing form and intensity, depending. I can personally attest to this and it seemed particularly helpful to others. And so I pass it along 😉 Aloha, Lorrie!
I agree with you, Bela. Realizing this truth is one thing…Being able to shift that energy and create healing is another! I suppose the first step to any change is recognizing the need for it. Blessings…and Aloha! Happy Thanksgiving, Bela! ♡
And to you as well, Lorrie <3
Dear one ….a “tag team ” of love now , here ! Love you , megxxx
Oh…how I embrace that idea…and LOVE IT SO!!! Yes, Meg! A tag team of love! Sending so much back to you…thank you for the beauty from your soul <3 Much light!
Awesome my warrior friend 💛
😉 Thanks, Val!! Sending lots of light ♡
Stronger and wiser you become as you walk into freedom.
And it feels so good, JoAnna!! Thank you so much for your beautiful support ♡
Each word that is thrown serves to strengthen our will .I am pleased you are no longer victim.. no longer to be walked over.. your journey through this labyrinth of emotions is serving two fold.. One it is teaching you valued lessons in learning to detach from those who have always sort to control and Two, it is allowing you to move through the stages of discernment of discovering again your inner core.. The Real YOU who was so long ago brow beaten within your self worth..
It takes courage to break through this chrysalis to take stock of your surroundings, as you hang upside down awaiting the blood to be pumped into your wings.. But I can now see dearest Lorrie.. ALL of these stages were for a purpose..
For you are Now poised to FLY… 🙂 Take flight dear friend.. for your wings will carry you far my friend xxx <3
I love flying, Sue….I LOVE FLYING!!!! 😉
Thank you for your beautiful response that is so full of truth!! Yes, I feel exactly what you have said and it is a most welcomed, beautiful, transformation! To say that I am grateful does not begin to cover the feelings that are inside and the beautiful energy that wants to be released! It all means something, Sue. I see it now, that every single person is on a journey and we all face different things that bring forth the opportunity to heal ourselves and to help others to heal. We need not force anything on others…those who are ready will find the energy they need! I am so grateful for this forum, for I don’t know how people were able to connect prior to the internet. I have so few people in the “flesh” that I can connect to in this way. I am grateful…I am Blessitude!! And I thank you for your love <3 <3 <3
Likewise Back Lorrie… It took me a long while to heal from past wounds my friend.. and we each of us have to go through the stages… I was a long while the caterpillar munching among the cabbages… Until I went into the pupa stage.. I went within for a long time it was I who held guilt.. And then I turned it around upon itself.. I saw without the shadows, the lack of love, the feeling of being rejected, I would never have emerged and broke free… When we finally SEE… and learn to LOVE ourselves… because for so long I felt unloved and unworthy.. ( Even though my immediate family gave me so much love.. ) The hurt I felt from my Mother clouded everything else.. It took a nervous breakdown, and years of inner battles… To finally understand.. And at last I could give Thanks .. For often those who are our greatest enemies, are often our greatest teachers.. xxx Hugs dear friend.. I am so grateful we met here.. <3
We, so many of us, share the same kind of pain. I applaud your perseverance, Sue…and the healing that you have gone through. YOU make it easier for people coming after you…and your words help so much…not just your words but your energy…your authenticity! It shows…it shines…it is!!! To beautiful love and respect, for ourselves, for others. I am so proud to stand with you…and to FLY!!! <3 <3
What a beautiful BEAUTIFUL compliment dear Lorrie.. Remember none of us are given more than we can carry.. And often we carry unnecessary loads..
I needed that breakdown in order for me to understand how it felt to be totally alone.. I know I would not be who I am today had I not experienced my experiences.. I often can ‘See’ behind the veil of others hidden pain, and because of my empathy, can share the gift I was given.. And I am ever thankful that I am given the right words at the right time which I know perhaps helps heal a little as others travel through a similar journey.. All roads Lorrie lead us back home.. and we are all of us travelling one step at a time.. <3 Mega Hugs xxx
I’m so grateful to be on the road with you. Blessings, light, and love <3
Likewise <3 xxx
Dear Lorrie, it does hurt when people hurt you. It’s hard not to go unscathed and it’s hard not to be angry or play the events over and over in one’s mind. However, I sense progress in the act of writing this piece. It is a cliche, but there is a reason for cliches to exist – time does heal woulds – and with your compassionate nature, you will progress, evolve and learn. I expect you have done much of that ready. As always, I got your back xo Harlon
You are a wonderful person to have on my team and I am so grateful! I am doing much, much better and you are correct…writing this series…and posting it…helped tremendously. I suppose that we will from time to time get hurt and then we always learn something from it…and then time heals 🙂 Thank you for your incredible support. Your strength as a friend is so wonderful. I hope you are well, not feeling too much pain ♡♡