Remember…
Tis the season to be jolly!
Each year as the calendar takes its last turn into the fall season, I feel an intrinsic sadness. Maybe because my favorite season – summer – has come to an end, but more likely because I can sense the holidays are on the horizon and that always brings on feelings of stress and anxiety.
Not everyone had a perfect childhood that made warm memories of family gatherings, gingerbread wafting through the air, and Christmas carols sung by the piano. No, my strongest memories were feeling my mother’s stress as she tried to make the holidays happen, when in her own words they, “didn’t have two nickels to rub together.”
Perhaps we had it all wrong even way back then. The commercial aspects of the holidays said there had to be a turkey and all the trimmings as families gathered in the energy of gratitude. There had to be a beautiful tree decorated with heirlooms from Christmases past – and don’t forget about the packages placed just so under the tree and the feeling you had as you searched for one with your name on it!
In my experience, more often than not, the gratitude was overshadowed by anger that would erupt in drama and physical violence. I guess The Momma wasn’t the only one who felt the stress.
The worst part about the holidays was the conflict I felt. I so wanted it to be a magical time full of good cheer, but it was hard to ignore the possibility of danger. The unpredictability of the characters in my story, made you walk on eggshells. They talked a good game and I believe deep down they wished for it to be different, but the damage was too deep.
Too often in life we are destined to repeat energy and patterns that we learned during
our informative years. But hey, who says that the “Informative years” ever end?
Why can’t we continue to learn and try each day to do just a little bit better?
I tried to make the holidays different for my son, through the years. I am not perfect, but I am certain that I succeeded on at least one level.
Now, as both my parents have passed, and distance and estrangement separate me from other members of my childhood family, I ease myself into this season aware of the pain that lingers, but willing to walk in a new story that has all the wonderful sights, smells, and loving kindness of what the season is meant to be.
For those of you who have always gotten the holiday “right,” I say, “BRAVO!” And for those less fortunate, who have had to navigate this time walking on eggshells I say, “I understand…but you have the power to change it!”
Make new traditions for the holidays that bring you JOY!
Make a pact with yourself that you CAN be happy as you make good
holiday memories with your family.
And most importantly, make a promise to yourself that the pain will stop here!
You deserve to feel the magic of the season 🙂
I send you all light and love and Sweet Blessings for the holidays! May they warm your heart. And remember…You can be happy during the holidays! <3
Blessitude!
Lorrie <3
12/19/2021
<3
😊
To give you a smile….
https://pacificparatrooper.files.wordpress.com/2021/12/christmas-kitty.webp
Received…and the target was nailed!! Thanks GP 🙂 🙂 I did need the smile…it was perfect!!
Sending you and yours all good wishes for the holidays and the rest of this year…boy did one ever go by faster?? <3
Every year I say it couldn’t go by faster – and then I’m proved wrong… go figure!
Letting go of conditioning, shoulds, and the pressure from others is such an important lesson right now.
Trust me , the world will not come to an end if you don’t bake cookies.
💖🙏💖
Yes, Val!!! And to take that a step further I won’t gain 5 pounds from eating all those cookies! 😉 Seriously…I am so very content with the new traditions I am starting and it has been very good to be aware of old pain…but to let that go too!
I hope that things are really good in your world, Val. Sending lots of Holiday Cheer…<3
Thank you Lorrie. Let life, and our choices be good 💖
Amen 🙏
What a lovely post, Lorrie! I’ve thought of you so often and will write to you soon. Everything you mentioned is perfect. This is a time of year to allow for magic, healing and gratitude. Wishing you all the best over the holidays, my friend!
Same, Same, Same, Judy!! I know I’ve been absent but you have for sure been on my mind and yes…we will connect soon!! Thank you for your energy here…and it is a time for “magic, healing and gratitude!” Three of my favorite things!! 😉 <3 _/\_
Hi Lorrie!!!
Love reading your thoughts, hopes, and kind sharings. I definitely enjoy my new holidays with the family I have created. It’s such a gift to be able to add to the good memories of the past and wash over the burdens and the hardships of that same past which made holidays so hard and unhappy. Fortunately they are in my rear view mirror right now, and I can TRULY enjoy the NOW. Happy holidays my dear friend!! 💗💗💗💗💗💗💗🎄🎄🎄🎁
Hello, beautiful Ka!! So so very nice to see you here. And you made my day to read your words. It is our choice how we move forward in this world and to see you with your new family and to know that you are making a decision to create what you want….Ah! That is a beautiful gift! I had my son when I was just a baby…and I sometimes wish I had more wisdom because in reality I literally grew up with him! But I wouldn’t change a thing. Life is amazing when you realize it is within your control!
I send you wishes of all wonderful things, Ka. It is so nice to connect when we do! 🙂
Sweet Blessings for a super wonderful holiday and rest of this year!! <3 <3
My dearest Lorrie How wonderful it is to read your inspiring post. Yes, too often the magic of Christmas and all it is meant to be is lost in the midst of stress, anxiety and sadness. Thank you for your beautiful reminder that we should embrace the Holiday season and make new traditions, as we should and design one to fit us. I’ll be watching the skies on Christmas Eve, having stilton on crackers and toasting on a glass of port. Have a fabulous time with your loved ones this Christmas, Lorrie. xx
Hi Georgina!! I love your response 🙂 And your Christmas eve sounds like a wonderful tradition! I sometimes wonder why it took me so long to realize my full power…but that doesn’t help anything. I feel it now and it is a beautiful thing! Here’s to all of us recognizing our power in this lifetime! I send you all good wishes of love, light, and peace. <3
Wonderfully said… I certainly can relate to childhood Christmas Arguments that would erupt on a regular basis each Christmas…
Thankfully My own family Christmas’s with my children brought that fun and laughter to dilute those childhood memories of my own into an explosion of new memories with my children..
Wonderful to be back Lorrie… Wishing you a Joyous Wonderful Holiday Season full of fun and laughter and love <3
Hi Sue!!! So nice to feel your energy! I got a giant smile when I saw you in my email 🙂 I’m sorry you, too, had “scary” times as a youngster…but oh so happy that you have been able to change that energy and make new traditions through the years. 🙂
Just this year…for the first time…I wanted to go Christmas Carolling. I got a group of 10 friends together. At first they thought it was silly, but then something magical happened. As we moved from house to house each person felt lifted…those of us who sang and those who graciously listened. By the time we were done each person decided that it would become a tradition that we would meet year after year! It was pretty awesome!
I will be over to check in on you, but I am so happy to connect. I send you so much love and good wishes, Sue! Thanks for leaving your beautiful energy here <3 <3
Wow that’s really wonderful singing lifts out heart vibrations
😊🙏💜
I’m glad you found the courage to move on! I’m sure you made Christmas (and the other 364 days of the year) better for your son, and I couldn’t agree more that we can’t change the past but that we absolutely can change our present, and therefore, our future as well. Wishing you and yours a very happy, peaceful, and loving Christmas! You deserve it!
Thank you so much, Ann! It is so wonderful to connect with people who believe in similar things. And it is amazing to be able to put theoretical ideas into action and see the results. I know I was not a perfect parent, but I tried my best to NOT DO a lot of things that I saw modeled as a child. The problem with that kind of learning is that you always know what you DON’T WANT to happen…but you are not always sure what you DO WANT. I know that is my go to strategy in problem solving. In fact, when I used to play tennis that is how I played…I figured out what I did not want to happen. My long-time partner thought I was negative because she would always strategize about what SHE DID WANT TO HAPPEN. That was the first time I realized the way I was wired. I have been a work in progress trying to learn a different way…but it is nice. And the more I think about it the more I know that so many things are coming together for good…and I am full of Blessitude!!!
Sending lots of good things your way, Ann. I hope that health and happiness is utmost on your list of wonderful blessings to come your way. Have a very Merry Christmas! <3
I hear you, Lorrie! I hope this holiday season is as stress free as possible for you (and your son too).
Hi Kristen! Thank you, sweet soul. I am so grateful for your kind blessing not only for me, but for my son. He can use a little extra love and blessing at this time.
I send all good thoughts and wishes for super peace to you and your family. I hope things are going well for you…though I always know you are way busy. So make sure to take some “me” time during this super stressful holiday season. Much love <3
Hi Lorrie, I hope that Christmas was a peaceful time for both you and your son. You have so much inner strength and awareness that comes through your writing here and that in itself will lead you to a brighter path and newer traditions. It’s not easy to let go of the past but sometimes it’s the best thing for us. In a different way I’m also letting go of old patterns, conditioning and expectations purely because I’m on the road and living a different life to the rest of my family. But I’m happy and being true to me. All the best for a wonderful new year. Sending you lots of love and big hugs from across the ocean. xx
Hi Miriam…I don’t know how this comment slipped through!
Thank you for your good wishes and super wonderful energy 😁 You always speak words that touch me deeply and I feel so connected. I had a wonder week plus living with my son. He drove home yesterday…unfortunately in the middle of a snow storm!!! We watched the weather every day and it was not on the radar. I was a bit worried as he called and said he was almost out of gas and all the stations he went to were closed…and the snow was piling up!! He made it home safely…Thank God…but it was a tough day to stay in the light and not worry!!
I send all good wishes for you, and want you to know that I am so proud of you for walking your path in your authentic space. Not everyone has the guts to do that…in fact most people don’t think that they can!!
I am well…working through my “stuff” …always!! But I am filled with so much love and gratitude…Blessitude 💜
All good things!!
Hi Lorrie, I’m so glad to hear you had such a wonderful time with you son. And equally I’m glad and relieved he made it home safely. I can well imagine you were worried! I would have been the same.
Thanks so much for your kind words and good wishes. It means a lot to me. I wish you lots of love and the warmest of wishes for all good blessings this year. As far as I’m concerned if you have love and gratitude you have it all! Much love. xx 💗
Thanks Miriam! I agree 100%! 😊🙏💜
Great post Lorrie and thanks for sharing this on many levels!! Glad you were able to be with your son!! May 2022 bring you peace and joy! Keep the faith and keep sharing it!! Blessings!!
Thanks, Kirt! We all add to the collective energy…and we are all connected!! I am full of gratitude 🙏 Here’s to living life from our truth and living in peace😊
My husband used to be tense about Christmas due to his childhood memories. His family waited for the big argument that “made” his father storm out of the house for the rest of the day. Then his mom and her sons could relax. Now, we have new traditions, but they are flexible. I love your words of hope, especially this part: “who says that the “Informative years” ever end? Why can’t we continue to learn and try each day to do just a little bit better?” We can and we are. And a little bit better is good enough. Sending peace, love and blessings to you, dear Lorrie! <3
Ah…JoAnna. It seems like the pain of dysfunction can get imbedded in our DNA, and even though the episodes are long gone there are triggers that can set off the discomfort at any given moment. I feel for your husband, but I also know that he can not only see, but FEEL a different way now, with you! What a blessing.
Sending lots of love and light and hope that you are realizing your dreams every single day! <3
<3 Love, light and hope to you. 🙂