In the darkness
I sit alone
Just a direct connection to my spirit…to my soul
A time to take solace
A time to examine
Look hard at the questions
Sit still and wait for enlightenment
I come away with the idea that the break was needed
That there wasn’t enough of a connection to the things that matter
That I was caught up in the wheel of life and I didn’t honor the path
The life that I am creating
The life that I want to live
So a self imposed exile was in order
A defined time out
A body that took control and said, “Hey, pay attention!”
With the little signs ignored
It had no choice but to make me sit up and take notice
No…it would not allow me to go back to old established patterns
Years of neglect
My body took the brunt of the emotional turmoil for years
It felt the pain that my mind couldn’t handle
It had its fill of silently suffering
Playing the martyr
Once strong and healthy it had a voice
A LOUD BOOMING BELLOW
One that could not be ignored
It has been a tough week
But I am starting my walk to the light that I see
Step by step
I cleanse my heart
I lay gratitude at my feet
I am filled with love and respect
I honor the relationship of mind, spirit, body
That even though tested
Will never be broken
A triumvirate connected
I has been a very tough, painful week. A massive sinus infection persisted through two doctors and two medications and eventually landed me in the emergency room begging for relief from the pain.
A very dear friend…my Soul Mate…wrote to me and said, “Imagine it is a ‘test’ to verify your ‘inner’ sun is able to shine even when the weather is bad.”
The next morning I woke early and walked up to the ocean. I thought the morning birth of my outer sun would spark my inner rays to reach out and cover my heart. For once stimulated…gently nudged…the hearts vibrations can not be stopped.
The peaceful lapping of the waves reflecting the colors of the sky washed over my soul. I could feel my inner child being held safe in the arms of love.
I thought about life. I looked around, in fact did a complete turn to take the whole morning in. And to my surprise, standing behind me was the waning gibbous moon that had been full of blood just the day before.
And in that moment I connected to the moon, to the earth, to the ocean, to the tides. I felt the rhythm of life inside me and I wanted to dance.
Yes…and somehow in the daybreak, what was broken started to repair.
Thank you my friends. Your well wishes and support during this painful time is appreciated more than I can possibly put into words. So I send you a message from my heart <3