A Relapse of Lyme Disease ~ A Pep Talk From an Angel

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The light of healing surrounds my aching body

An Angel whispers to me on soft breezes

as the touch of love caresses my face

“There is no pain in God’s World.

Remember who you are and where you came from.

Live from the center of your soul

and listen as your body tells you secrets.

You are safe and you are loved.

You are part of the Divine Whole

and your essence here serves a great purpose.

Learn.

Learn all you can.

Keep your heart wide open

and accept all the gifts,

even when they don’t appear to be

the gifts you would like.

Do not make judgments.

Know that every single event in your life,

from what you consider the mundane

to the truly tragic,

is orchestrated with your highest good in mind.

Walk through the darkness,

and ease the pain with your mind.

Believe in the power that lives inside.

Know that you have the ability to do,

to create,

to become,

whatever you truly set your mind to.

You have created everything.

Once you understand this,

you will stand in your power,

and your creations will no longer reflect

a broken, separated, being,

but will reflect

the true light

of God’s Love.”

Blessitude

Lorrie ❤

2/26/17

Ya gotta love Angels!!

Is it any wonder I can handle this relapse as well as I am when you read this Pep Talk from an Angel?  I honestly believe this, coupled with the help you have all given to me, is the reason that I am as grounded, and loving to myself through this very painful time.  So a big whopping THANK YOU is in order!!! 

I know prayer works.  I also know that our prayers are not always answered the way we would like, or heck, for that matter they may not be answered at all…But that reminds me of a song by Garth Brooks…”Sometimes I Thank God, For Unanswered Prayers.”

We think we know best, but that’s just not always true.  We think we can fight something and always be the victor.  I am learning that life can, and will, throw us curveballs.  The true lesson is that I have the power and the control, and perhaps it’s the ONLY control I do have, to the way I respond.  And my new mantra is, “Respond thoughtfully, never react.”

Thank you all for sharing this journey with me.  I am Blessitude ❤  And to all of you who are walking through your own dark nights, I send you beautiful while healing light tinged with the colors of the rainbow to put a smile on your face.  YOU CAN DO ANYTHING!!!

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I had to include the ‘original’ photograph I used and manipulated for all the photos in the series (except this final one of the Angels over the ocean.)  It was in a flower arrangement at Disney’s Yacht & Beach Club Resort.  I have to say this ‘flower’ creeped me out!!  I had just started the medicine and the bacteria were going crazy in my body, and when I looked at this creepy flower it reminded me of this icky disease.  I never met a flower I didn’t like…I won’t say I don’t like this one but it’s hairy!! 🙂  I’m not positive, but I think it might be “Leucospermum.”

This is the final post in the series:  A Relapse of Lyme Disease

The other posts in the series are in order and can be accessed by clicking on the title that is highlighted in red.  Thank you so much for visiting ❤

  1. And I Thought I Was Done With That!
  2. I Already Fought This War
  3. Like a Ton of Bricks
  4. I Was Positive It Would Never Return
  5. You Can’t Control Everything
  6. Failure
  7. The List
  8. The Treatment
  9. I’m in The Happiest Place on Earth
  10. She Asked Me What It Feels Like
  11. Game On!
  12. A Pep Talk From An Angel

 

A Relapse of Lyme Disease ~ Game On!!!

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It is hard to manage the emotional aspects of this disease.  I suspect most diseases are that way.

It is back to basics for me.

Forget the pity party, forget the pain and get on with not fighting this disease, because I remember so clearly that the things we fight, the things we try to keep away from us, are the things that we draw to us.

So I will take medicine that kills the bacteria it can find (speaking to the smart ones that hide in a cocoon) as I work on all the other aspects of healing, not the least of which is turning around my negative, self-punishing attitude that this relapse has resurrected.

Apparently, there is more for me to learn.  So I wipe my hands, and pick up my heart, and hold the intention that I AM WELLI AM WORTHYI AM LOVE…and I say…

GAME ON!!!

Blessitude

Lorrie ❤

2/24/17

Oh, I’m in the game!  Full – on – in the game!!  I have never been more sure I CAN DO THIS!!  Oh, yeah…I CAN DO THIS!!!

Thank you my friends!  I am 100% certain that this resolve I feel is in part due to the love you have shared with me here.  I want you all to know that I am strong and I am certain that I am in full on healing mode!!!

Bless you all ❤

THE LINKS WILL BE ACTIVE AFTER EACH POST IS PUBLISHED.  ACTIVE LINKS WILL APPEAR IN RED.
  1. And I Thought I Was Done With That!
  2. I Already Fought This War
  3. Like a Ton of Bricks
  4. I Was Positive It Would Never Return
  5. You Can’t Control Everything
  6. Failure
  7. The List
  8. The Treatment
  9. I’m in The Happiest Place on Earth
  10. She Asked Me What It Feels Like
  11. Game On!
  12. A Pep Talk From An Angel

A Relapse of Lyme Disease ~ Failure

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The miles rack up.

Plenty of time to think.

To analyze.

To try to lay blame.

To punish myself.

To promise to do better.

Plenty of time

to feel embarrassment

and not want to tell anyone

I have had a relapse

And that I just wasn’t good enough

to beat this disease.

A failure.

I feel like a complete failure.

What did I do to allow this

opportunistic infection to

invade my body again?

To take over my body again?

Blessitude

Lorrie ❤

2/12/17

I won’t lie.  My first thought was that I would not tell anyone because I was so embarrassed.  I am so grateful that I did not follow that route because I am no longer ashamed and realize there should be no blame.  And I should not beat myself up. 😉  And we are much better off when we are in a place where we can ask for help.  Thank you my friends, for helping ❤

THE LINKS WILL BE ACTIVE AFTER EACH POST IS PUBLISHED.  ACTIVE LINKS WILL APPEAR IN RED.
  1. And I Thought I Was Done With That!
  2. I Already Fought This War
  3. Like a Ton of Bricks
  4. I Was Positive It Would Never Return
  5. You Can’t Control Everything
  6. Failure
  7. The List
  8. The Treatment
  9. I’m in The Happiest Place on Earth
  10. She Asked Me What It Feels Like
  11. Game On!
  12. A Pep Talk From An Angel

A Relapse of Lyme Disease ~ You Can’t Control Everything

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You can’t control everything…

CAN YOU?

I certainly tried through all these years.

And what I eventually found was that

I control NOTHING!

Well, nothing but what I decide to think.

So in essence, I can do

exactly what I did last time…

and we all know that insanity

So I wouldn’t expect a different outcome

or

I can decide to try something different.

But all I really want to do

is

cry.

Blessitude

Lorrie ❤

2/10/17

It is almost mind boggling how I try to repeat things I know will not help.  It is mainly the feeling of helplessness because I just don’t know how to handle my life day to day.  You think that you could get a bead on just how much activity was ‘enough’ activity, versus it being ‘way too much’ acitivity and it renders you bed bound for days.

I like to KNOW things.  I would like to have the secret recipe for what would make me feel better…or at least not make me feel worse.

I am struggling to let that all go, but it is hard.  I know I need to use my body but there is no magic formula for not doing too much.  Maybe anything is too much…

THE LINKS WILL BE ACTIVE AFTER EACH POST IS PUBLISHED.  ACTIVE LINKS WILL APPEAR IN RED.
  1. And I Thought I Was Done With That!
  2. I Already Fought This War
  3. Like a Ton of Bricks
  4. I Was Positive It Would Never Return
  5. You Can’t Control Everything
  6. Failure
  7. The List
  8. The Treatment
  9. I’m in The Happiest Place on Earth
  10. She Asked Me What It Feels Like
  11. Game On!
  12. A Pep Talk From An Angel

A Relapse of Lyme Disease ~ I Was Positive It Would Never Return

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Surely, I must be wrong because

I BEAT IT!

I BEAT IT!

I KNOW I DID!!

It was gone.

I was healed.

I felt great…

Until I didn’t.

Sure…

It was a tough year.

Many things happened that broke my heart.

But I got through them!

I survived.

I am so much better equipped to deal with

the curve balls that life throws at me.

I never considered it would return.

In fact,

I WAS POSITIVE IT WOULD NEVER RETURN!

It’s hard to believe that I was wrong.

Blessitude

Lorrie ❤

2/8/17

I have accepted what is, but I still feel a little incredulity that it is so.  I know that the things we fight only get magnified in energy, so I try my hardest each day to live in the energy of full acceptance.

It hurts… a lot!  And today it feels like I have the flu, so that is a good sign.  It means that the meds are killing the bacteria and the die off is taxing my system.  A key component to healing is to take positive steps to detox on a daily basis.  Come to think of it that’s not a bad idea even if we aren’t sick!

Blessitude, my friends ❤

THE LINKS WILL BE ACTIVE AFTER EACH POST IS PUBLISHED.  ACTIVE LINKS WILL APPEAR IN RED.
  1. And I Thought I Was Done With That!
  2. I Already Fought This War
  3. Like a Ton of Bricks
  4. I Was Positive It Would Never Return
  5. You Can’t Control Everything
  6. Failure
  7. The List
  8. The Treatment
  9. I’m in The Happiest Place on Earth
  10. She Asked Me What It Feels Like
  11. Game On!
  12. A Pep Talk From An Angel

A Relapse of Lyme Disease ~ And I Thought I was Done With That!

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My heart just couldn’t go there

My mind dared to travel down the road

Short distances…before it turned back

Because it too

Could not stand to face the scenery

Just beyond awareness

After all,

I already traveled down that road

I already met with

all the possible experiences on that route

I met them…

I lived them…

I lived THROUGH them…

AND I THOUGHT I WAS DONE WITH THAT!

I thought I learned

All I needed to learn

And I thought I felt

All I needed to feel

But I guess I was wrong.

Again.

Blessitude

Lorrie ❤

1/30/17

Hi friends.  I’ve been a bit absent as I have had a few things to deal with, the least of which is the return of serious symptoms of Lyme Disease.

This post is part of a series of writings that flowed from this experience.  The links below are listed in order and will be active just after each post is published.  Thanks for taking the ride 🙂  Lorrie

  1. And I Thought I Was Done With That!
  2. I Already Fought This War
  3. Like a Ton of Bricks
  4. I Was Positive It Would Never Return
  5. You Can’t Control Everything
  6. Failure
  7. The List
  8. The Treatment
  9. I’m in The Happiest Place on Earth
  10. She Asked Me What It Feels Like
  11. Game On!
  12. A Pep Talk From An Angel