The seemingly impossible task of clearing out the Momma’s home and getting her settled in her new space, all by the end of 2014…December 31, 2014 by the stroke of midnight…was accomplished! At 10:00pm my SUV, jam-packed with the things I couldn’t fit into her new space but couldn’t possibly get rid of, pulled out of her driveway.
I actually saw the ball drop at Midnight because it is an hour drive home and then I had to unload the truck into a giant pile in my living room. Yes, some things will leave and make the trip up north…the baby grandfather wall clock that was promised to my son…the flat screen TV that will replace an old tube TV. The rest I’m not sure where it will all fit in my tiny condo that is already bursting at the seams.
This is creating a “forced purge” of my things to make room for her things. And I stop to ponder things, and our attachment to them. Do we keep them because we fear we will forget our life at that time? After all, why do I need a frilly glass cake dish? I don’t eat cake! But when I came across it, I couldn’t put it in the “donate” pile.
I don’t know…it, along with many other things remind me of The Momma. The young Momma…full of life. Always working hard trying to make ends meet. She didn’t have an easy life. In fact, it was at most times very difficult. But she never complained. She just kept putting one foot in front of the other and she ALWAYS made sure we were taken care of. She couldn’t always protect us, heck, she couldn’t protect herself. But we always had a roof over our heads, food on the table, and clothes on our backs.
Now she is nearing the end stage of her life here on earth. She is scared. I want to help her, but the ways that she needs help now are very personal and between her and God. One thing I can say for sure is she continues to put one foot in front of the other. She may not like that she has basically lost all of her independence, but she has accepted that “this is her life now.”
I am so grateful that we were able to get everything done. I was so busy I barely had time to think, let alone write. Now comes the emotional part. The time that the energy that lives in all the mementos I kept, release their hold on the psyche of my past.
Isn’t that what a New Year is for?
One thing I know for sure is that life does change. And in the process, so do we. This is when I need to take a page out of The Momma’s book and accept that “this is my life now.”
I wish you all Grace in the changes you face in your life…acceptance.