LONELY CHAIRS

2016-07-27 11.19.49

LONELY CHAIRS

backdrop of summer

days gone by

the lonely heart grieves

days gone by

a man in a tie

we point and laugh

I gasp in disbelief

swim to the last barrel

a member of the club

fear the size of the surf

7th avenue

it WAS heaven

a slice of my life

times that were free

talked about everything

that ever meant anything

dry my eyes

the pain taken away

never looked back

saw you swimming

in a hurricane

destructive storm

tore the landscape of our past

destructive life

ripped the heart out of your chest

never been more sorry

than the pain I felt from you…

I did not know

too much to

bare your soul

drowning in the loss

swimming out to sea

wishing the current

would just take you

away

my heart

and soul

have never left you

endless hours crying

and wishing I could hold you

My Dear friend

 

Oh, how we could sit for hours, baking in the sun. Talking never got old.

Do you know that you were my best friend?

You helped me through such a dark time in my life. It was like you knew that if you didn’t make me talk, every single day, that I just might have left…gone on to different pastures.

And I don’t even know if I ever thanked you.

And then there was a time when I could have done the same for you…and I didn’t.

I have forgiven myself for a lot of things, but no…not that one.

And it seems to just say I’m sorry to you wouldn’t be enough.

But I am.

 

Our chairs are now empty, as are parts of our hearts.

But know that in the landscape of my life you have always been right up there at the top!

The one with no secrets…

The one with so many answers…

The one who tried to talk sense into me…

But I never listened!

I wonder now if you caught on and started to tell me what you thought I SHOULDN’T do…?

Yeah.

I have always loved you.

And I have always known that you love me.

I miss you ❤

Blessitude!

Lorrie ❤

8/5/16

 

35 thoughts on “LONELY CHAIRS

  1. This is a very poignant and heartfelt post Lorrie. It sounds like this person was a great help and support to you. I do hope you’ll be gentle with yourself. We do the best we can. It’s not fair to hold your past self to your present self’s skill and awareness level. You might have to remind me of this when I beat myself up for poor investment choices. 🙂
    I hope you have a peaceful weekend. hugs and blessings.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Ah! Brad!! What an incredibly wonderful sentiment…you are so correct and I thank you for the nudge to be gentle. Yes…this person is very special to me and when we ran into each other yesterday so many memories came flooding back! Thank you for your kind words and I promise to return the love…and guidance to be gentle. You really have given me something to think about! ♡♡

      Liked by 2 people

    1. “The Momma” always said ‘time heals all wounds’ Val, and even as a small child I believed her. All the work I have done which facilitated the healing I have done so far is a good reminder that it CAN be done. I don’t have many regrets in life, because it all brought me where I am…and I am happy here. But this regret is real and I will have to find a way to reconcile it. Thanks, Val. I know your Saturdays are usually very busy…may it be a great one ♡

      Liked by 1 person

  2. You won’t believe the synchronicity of your beautiful post for me! Thursday night I lost a dear friend and many of my feelings about her. Your eloquence really touches my heart! Thank you!

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    1. Oh, Carol, my heart reaches out with a giant hug. This is one more reminder of how connected we are…we all have very similar life experiences. I send lots of love and I am happy my words touched you…there is a whole lot of feeling in them. Much love ♡

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Hariod 🙂 MD is no longer in our earthly plane…so my answer is ‘maybe!’ My friend, whom I ran into yesterday, will hopefully be able to find my little blog. So my answer is ‘I hope so!’
      I stopped by your blog and read your latest post, Hariod. I have not read the comments yet, nor commented myself, but plan to devote the time necessary this weekend. Your posts and the conversation that follows, deserve a quiet niche of time and a nice cup of tea…oh…and my little puppy on my lap 😉 ♡

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Well, let’s hope that both well-loved friends feel your sentiments. 🙂 Sending our thoughts out, if sufficiently heartfelt, and whether within earshot or eyesight, somehow has a tendency to find their mark in time, it seems.

        Thankyou for your interest I’m own efforts, dear friend. 🙂 I’m only posting once every six or seven weeks nowadays, and this latest one is less oblique than many past efforts, I think (and hope) you’ll agree. Finding the balance between putting a philosophical(?) idea across whilst remaining readable and not too effort-inducing hasn’t always come easily to me, it must be said. It’s a learning process, and I’m only grateful to have a few kind folk such as yourself bear with me as I fumble my way along the dark. o_O

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    1. Oh…Kim…thanks. I was so happy to see my friend. Even though I have regrets of not being there when needed most…we just have a bond that years can go by and it feels like we sat in those beach chairs yesterday. Hope your weekend is super ♡

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  3. I’ve had that thought that I wish I could have helped some one more who helped me so much. People, guides, come into our lives when we need them. Maybe someone else helped your guide earlier. Maybe you will help someone else with the wisdom you received back then. I bet you already have. ❤ Beautiful writing, Lorrie.

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    1. Oh…JoAnna…thank you for your beautiful thoughts 🙂 We all play a role in someone else’s story…we don’t always realize it at the time. Maybe with increased awareness we will be able to be who and what we want to be for others. Blessings dear friend ♡

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  4. Our soul is the best reminder and timing of what we must do, painful and sad memories often bubble to the surface along with the happy. Timing of this is so important, I often ask why now and not before. Beautiful and always soulful words. Your memories of a beautiful soul. Whether here or in the Divine they will receive and see these words, thoughts and feelings. Blessings always with you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for your heartfelt message that is full of compassion! Yes…I think you have something here about the timing…it is an important factor for understanding all that is being presented. And I also agree these words will he seen by those written for. Hope you have a beautiful day ♡

      Liked by 1 person

  5. What a beautiful post…touched me as I thought back through the people God has put into my life at specific times for specific reasons…embrace that aspect and as Brad said…be gentle to yourself!! Best to you!!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. This was written from deep within your heart dear Lorrie.. I know how special a deep friendship is and how a broken one breaks our hearts.. Know too that it is also a two way experience.. And lessons are not always as we see them upon the surface..
    We are all given the chance to heal from these second encounters.. ( reading more from your comments. ) And forgive me if I recount a personal experience here Lorrie… I know from my own experiences with my Mother who didn’t speak to me for 10 yrs.. In the months before her sudden death.. We bumped into each other around a corner in our Town.. I spoke, asking how she was, It was her choice to turn and almost run without speaking back in the opposite direction.. The Universe gave her that chance to heal wounds.. Sadly she turned away from it..
    But it also showed me that the Universe was also telling me.. Nothing I could do would change her stubborn streak.. And that it had given me a chance in my own way to know I had tried my best throughout the whole 10 yrs of reaching out..
    Knowing within ourselves the Love we have always held for our family and friends how ever Life twists us to part .. That Inner Knowing about doing our best, and you should not think any less of yourself for the emotional journey it took you through.
    For all things are for purpose as we expand and grow from each experience we set ourselves to encounter..
    And your friend will know on that Soul Level your true heart my friend..

    Love and Healing thoughts dear Lorrie..
    Sue xxx ❤ ❤ ❤

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    1. First, dear Sue, please let me thank you for sharing something so personal and so poignant here on my blog. It is a very meaningful event in your life that has obviously caused great pain, but along with that – great healing. The fact that you share that kind of transformation helps all who read it. It is like a shining beacon that healing is possible for all! And you and I both know that that is TRUTH! The pain is an opening of our heart space that allows us blossom with LOVE!!
      You are also correct that this post was written from a very deep place in my heart. It was not planned…it was something that happened that day and I did not rest until I got it out. I am hopeful that my friend found it, but as you stated it does not matter if these actual words were read. We both know our place in each other’s lives and as you said, at the soul level-all is known!!
      Much love to you. Thank you for the beautiful energy you share. I am so very grateful for our connection ❤ ❤

      Liked by 1 person

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