CONSEQUENCES ~ I Am Not Completely Unscathed

picsart_11-10-01-54-33

I am not completely unscathed

Try as I may to protect my heart

The pounding insults start to leave their mark

Is this a test to see how well I am doing?

Bring back to back assaults from the original abusers to see how I would fare?

And what exactly is it

That doesn’t allow me to just cut the ties

To just walk away

And not turn back

What is their hold on me that doesn’t let me not turn into it again?

I don’t have the answers in this moment

But I do know

That I didn’t cower in a corner

For either one of them!

I lost my cool with the first

But that made me better able to deal with the second

A tag team of abuse

It is not fun

There’s a distant smell of fear

No.Β  I’m not completely unscathed

But I’m not a victim either!

Blessitude!

Lorrie ❀

11/20/16

POSTS IN THE SERIES

(Links will become active after each writing is posted)

1). Consequences ~ The Fishing Expedition

2). Consequences ~ The Fallout

3). Consequences ~ The Bottom Line

4). Consequences ~ The Continuum of Light

5). Consequences ~ I Am Not Completely Unscathed

6). Consequences ~ Choices

7). Consequences ~ THANKSGIVING

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My healing journey on the continuum of "It's all wrong" to "It's all right!" I love art and the creative process, reading, writing, and playing tennis.

55 thoughts on “CONSEQUENCES ~ I Am Not Completely Unscathed

  1. Each word that is thrown serves to strengthen our will .I am pleased you are no longer victim.. no longer to be walked over.. your journey through this labyrinth of emotions is serving two fold.. One it is teaching you valued lessons in learning to detach from those who have always sort to control and Two, it is allowing you to move through the stages of discernment of discovering again your inner core.. The Real YOU who was so long ago brow beaten within your self worth..
    It takes courage to break through this chrysalis to take stock of your surroundings, as you hang upside down awaiting the blood to be pumped into your wings.. But I can now see dearest Lorrie.. ALL of these stages were for a purpose..
    For you are Now poised to FLY… πŸ™‚ Take flight dear friend.. for your wings will carry you far my friend xxx ❀

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    1. I love flying, Sue….I LOVE FLYING!!!! πŸ˜‰
      Thank you for your beautiful response that is so full of truth!! Yes, I feel exactly what you have said and it is a most welcomed, beautiful, transformation! To say that I am grateful does not begin to cover the feelings that are inside and the beautiful energy that wants to be released! It all means something, Sue. I see it now, that every single person is on a journey and we all face different things that bring forth the opportunity to heal ourselves and to help others to heal. We need not force anything on others…those who are ready will find the energy they need! I am so grateful for this forum, for I don’t know how people were able to connect prior to the internet. I have so few people in the “flesh” that I can connect to in this way. I am grateful…I am Blessitude!! And I thank you for your love ❀ ❀ ❀

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      1. Likewise Back Lorrie… It took me a long while to heal from past wounds my friend.. and we each of us have to go through the stages… I was a long while the caterpillar munching among the cabbages… Until I went into the pupa stage.. I went within for a long time it was I who held guilt.. And then I turned it around upon itself.. I saw without the shadows, the lack of love, the feeling of being rejected, I would never have emerged and broke free… When we finally SEE… and learn to LOVE ourselves… because for so long I felt unloved and unworthy.. ( Even though my immediate family gave me so much love.. ) The hurt I felt from my Mother clouded everything else.. It took a nervous breakdown, and years of inner battles… To finally understand.. And at last I could give Thanks .. For often those who are our greatest enemies, are often our greatest teachers.. xxx Hugs dear friend.. I am so grateful we met here.. ❀

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        1. We, so many of us, share the same kind of pain. I applaud your perseverance, Sue…and the healing that you have gone through. YOU make it easier for people coming after you…and your words help so much…not just your words but your energy…your authenticity! It shows…it shines…it is!!! To beautiful love and respect, for ourselves, for others. I am so proud to stand with you…and to FLY!!! ❀ ❀

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          1. What a beautiful BEAUTIFUL compliment dear Lorrie.. Remember none of us are given more than we can carry.. And often we carry unnecessary loads..
            I needed that breakdown in order for me to understand how it felt to be totally alone.. I know I would not be who I am today had I not experienced my experiences.. I often can ‘See’ behind the veil of others hidden pain, and because of my empathy, can share the gift I was given.. And I am ever thankful that I am given the right words at the right time which I know perhaps helps heal a little as others travel through a similar journey.. All roads Lorrie lead us back home.. and we are all of us travelling one step at a time.. ❀ Mega Hugs xxx

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  2. Dear Lorrie, it does hurt when people hurt you. It’s hard not to go unscathed and it’s hard not to be angry or play the events over and over in one’s mind. However, I sense progress in the act of writing this piece. It is a cliche, but there is a reason for cliches to exist – time does heal woulds – and with your compassionate nature, you will progress, evolve and learn. I expect you have done much of that ready. As always, I got your back xo Harlon

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    1. You are a wonderful person to have on my team and I am so grateful! I am doing much, much better and you are correct…writing this series…and posting it…helped tremendously. I suppose that we will from time to time get hurt and then we always learn something from it…and then time heals πŸ™‚ Thank you for your incredible support. Your strength as a friend is so wonderful. I hope you are well, not feeling too much pain β™‘β™‘

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