The Haze

 

2015-02-28 09.54.27

The haze makes it hard to see

fog surrounds my brain

mist occludes my sight

the distance hurts my heart

I know you are there

but I am having trouble finding you

the darkness surrounds

the dreams that were meant to be

it permeates the air

and chokes the tired sobs

that lay at the base of my throat

the sobs that have been strangled

with bare hands

soft from lack of hard work

the mind plays tricks

and would have me believe

that I could find you any time I desired

but my reality subsists

in the recesses of the darkness

that comes to play in fields

fertile with doubt

planted with seeds

that sprout the ugliest parts of my personality

and I weep

and the tears make it even harder to see

Blessitude

Lorrie ❤

3/10/15

 

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My healing journey on the continuum of "It's all wrong" to "It's all right!" I love art and the creative process, reading, writing, and playing tennis.

40 thoughts on “The Haze

  1. You bare your soul in your poetry and it is honest and beautiful. I am smiling, because I cried tonight for the first time in a long time…and then I read your poem :). Even in the haze- He is with you. Even though the tears cloud your vision, He is there. Much love to you, my friend!!!

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    1. Oh, Julie…Thank you so much…you just made me cry!! I know He is there…even when it seems that I can’t see anything…maybe even more so then!! You always touch my heart and I am so grateful for your love! I hope that everything is ok…I know it is good to cry sometimes. Much love to you Julie ❤

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      1. I don’t know if you do this, but once I get started crying- the floodgates open, lol!! That’s what happened to me this evening. I have let it all go and am ready to begin tomorrow fresh!! His mercies are new every day :). Much love to you, too!!!

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        1. Oh, Yes!! The kind with wracking trying to catch my breath crying…Yes…we are.not strangers!! 🙂 We weren’t allowed to cry as children which was ludicrous!! You can only imagine what happens when you are told NOT to cry! Because of that I tried for many years not to…and thought it was a sign of weakness. I know better now…and I love a good cry! ❤

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    1. Hi Brad! Thank you my friend…I am very grateful to have your support! I would bet that most people experience the haze at one time or another…I am so lucky to have such beautiful souls offer a hand that I can see and I hope that I can do the same for others. I love that you linked to Trini’s poem…she is a sweet Angel and I am certain that someone here will see it who needs it <3. Have a beautiful Wednesday, Brad!!

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    1. Oh Theresa…Wow! Your words are incredibly humbling to me…Thank you for your very kind thoughts! I’m sorry you know this hard place…but I think that must mean you know the opposite as well…and that makes me very happy 😉 Thank you so much for your beautiful support ❤

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  2. Tears water the garden of your soul. Let them flow freely, nourishing the seeds that sprout the most beautiful part of your being. Breathe deeply. Breathe in courage. Then rest with sweet dreams of better days ahead. Peace to you dear one.

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    1. Ah…such a beautiful poetic response…it’s speaks to my heart dear friend 🙂 I am learning to “feel” what is mine without panicking. To know that not only is everything that happens is okay…but everything I feel is okay as well! It is empowering to honor everything that is ME! Thank you my dear JoAnne…your heart and soul are so beautiful!! 🙂 ❤

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    1. Hi Neha!! Thank you so much for your support…for your beautiful words…and for always giving me something beautiful to read when I visit your home!!! I am in a place where there is great understanding. I can sit with what I am learning and hold it with love…not fear 🙂 Thank you dear heart…I hope all is super wonderful in your world!! ❤

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